Happy mother's day!

2013

2013 the new year.
I already started working. Things have been fast for me. Although things have been not favourable at the start. Since all my friends went to Singapore to work and left me ans Rachel end up in together in hospital. It's not that it is not fair for me. I guess it is not my luck to go to Singapore and destined to be here with my family instead. It is a lonely start. This because rachel start later than me and I had to adapt to New environment. Then when she joined, although I also joined to stay with her, I still don't get to hang out with her much either. This is because hmm the schedule for both of us is totallly opposite. I off she work. I morning she will be afternoon. So basically I see her sleep and I see her sleep. So its a bit lonely in many ways. And now I have family commitments which take up many of my time and money. Lagi sad. Oh well that's life isn't it?

After 5 months of work, it suppose to have more stable feeling of either work, money and everything else. But it doesnt seems so. More insecurity floats up. Work, people expect more of me and I am still fear to be more competent. Family, I don't have enough time for them due to work and resting time really eats up a lot, just too exhausted from work, travelling and moving here and there. Money, hmm I consider bankrupt now, debt seems to be an issue now, now only waiting for the coming month salary to solve my current debt. This is the most pathetic part. Hai maybe I shouldn't buy phone then will have some cash on hand. But that is the only thing I bought for myself since I start work. Definitely won't regret but just feel bad since I now run out of cash. Hmmm bad feeling huh.

I really sincerely felt that, can my life more easier? It's just the start of the new year I already felt a bit suffocated. Other than work at work place and at home, I have no life dy. Zero entertainment. I should learn New coping mechanisms, since I cant change my life maybe should change the way I look at life. It will be better I am sure right? Aza fighting valerie!