So as the topic says, i got a job. Truthfully, not sure is lucky or it is because i am a imu graduate. Anyway,have to be grateful that i have a job. At first was thinking of starting my career in singapore. However, due to my bad interview skills ( lack of knowledge), which is thought by me obviously cause they won't tell you why you are not being offered right? So i got a job in KL. At first thought of declining this one and find somemore, cause u see more of my frens is in Singapore, as human, you will tends to want to be with the group that you are so close before. This one i got in KL suppose to be a back up plan, but if i reject, i might not get another better than this. So that's my decision made one month ago. I decided to take up the challenge, ICU job offer. It suppose to be a random pick due to my dad's concern that i wouldn't get job in singapore. Now it became to be my permanent job.
When u heard ICU, you will be as shock as me, such an intensive place, and you must be knowledgeable. Yup, when i first came, i am really stress, cause i am a bottle with no water (chinese idiom). Plus when they ask me question i only can answer a bit. The nurses there are so competent, and they seems to know everything and that's the reason they look so calm. So jealous, when i will become like them?
Anyway, there is a preceptor to guide me, telling those things that i suppose to learn, and the rest its up to my initiative to learn. The problem is although this preceptor don't induce fear, but she was able to make me study every night without fail. Not sure is i pressurized myself too much or really she have the ability to make me so responsible of myself, never in my life i was so studious. The first two weeks was a pain cause i am fearing of unknown everyday, such a new environment, new colleagues, new rules, new kind of practice ( private this time), just make me shakes everyday. but now, i felt more relaxed and able to write this post.
Although, in more relaxed mode, i dun understand why i am so "lucky" when the time i start mentor and mentee week, the whole hospital have quality control check from outside and they are aiming at ICU and on freshie like me!!!!!!! I am so dead. Seriously why i always end up in this kind of situation? So now have to make sure that i know everything about the hospital and ICU practice. So many things to remember and so many things i still not sure whether i should know or not. Everyday during meeting, i surely will be called upon. Sometimes i felt that they should ask more, its better than die now in front of own colleagues than outsiders who will grade you and whatever you do represent the hospital and it will directly affect whether they got the license for how long. What a huge responsibility i have now!!!! stress!!! anyway, hopefully i can act coolly in front of them,kekeke, sounded very impossible le.
So let's see how it goes. can i survive it?who will be my mentor which will assess me? Hopefully someone who loves to teach,so that i can learn a lot!!
Although i cannot go singapore as people wanted me to go, i didn't felt sad either, cause i can learn a lot here and got one of my classmates is with me! it is enough. I believe things will get better for me! However i still felt a bit weird of telling ppl i have started work, cause i still in probation, if anything goes wrong, touchwood. maybe when i am confirm, i will bravely tell ppl where i work! =)
